BLOG • PAGE 2

Well, here's another Holiday Season which traditionally heralds the ending of another year. This one contained a couple of milestones which may be worth mentioning. In 2018, I found myself gainfully unemployed for the first time in 20 years and I began creating 3D pieces in a big way---though they are not huge themselves. When you are handed a lemon or two you either add them to an alcoholic drink or you use their skins to make an exotic jelly. I'm not a big drinker so I found making something exotic preferable. Being able to think about my work without interruption throughout a day, a week, and/or month has been not only an illuminating experience, it has allowed me to both expand and compact ideas. It's as though I have become a universe which is expanding and contracting simultaneously. Vague notions have become physical objects which can be viewed from all sides.. Ideas that seemed convoluted and overwrought have become simplified and more easily digested visually. I'm not saying they have become easily digested overall, merely reduced to their essence.

To date, I have produced 26 3D pieces since late June of this year. I am currently working on numbers 27 and 28. I have also painted a number of paintings and drawn many small sketches. This amount of productivity would not have been possible if I still had an eight or more hour workday to siphon much of my energy, creative or otherwise. This makes me think of all the artists who have the opportunity to work unencumbered and are free to think and ponder art with minimal interruption. Picasso was a creative fellow but he was also a very lucky one. You combine boundless creativity with 'free' time and it's little wonder he produced so much work. But I would not have wanted to BE him. I have enjoyed being who and what I am for as long as I can remember. :)

It is unfortunate that I have never deemed it necessary to play anyone's game or abide by anyone's rules but my own. But I put that down to just being me. As I have noted previously, I began as a poet who drew and became a person who creates pretty much anything he can visualize in his head or can pull from the end of a pen or pencil. That I can still do this at my tender age of 66 means something, if not to the planet at large, at least to me personally. So I shall continue for as long as I can. It has become my impetus for living in a world where many seem to have no real sense of self and who hurt, hate and belittle as a means of bringing the world down to their level. Artists do not live in ivory towers to look down upon the world with bemused looks upon their faces. They live in the real world alongside everyone else, whether they choose to engage in much of the fruitless and hurtful behavior or not. So here I am living and working on my art in a world which prizes triviality and largely ignores honesty and talent. We currently exist in a world where traditional values exist at the bottom of a heap of garbage. This gives me a vague idea for a new piece. Let's see if I can define it more clearly in the coming days. :)

I'm working on another sculpture presently so thought I would drop a few words of indelible wisdom upon you. Well, maybe not indelible and, maybe, not truly wisdom but a few thoughts emanating from this head at this present time. I've been running thoughts like some folks run water when they're brushing their teeth. if I don't occasionally share a few, I fear I'm being as wasteful as those tooth brushers. :)

I found myself writing my life story here since arriving in Austin in the summer of 1973 but I deleted it. Suffice it to say that I have been interested in art since an early age. I did illustrations for the school paper and even got a custom job as well in high school. No lessons though. I now wonder if being an art major over an English would have been the better course but my parents wouldn't have stood for it. Anyway, after so many years what could have been is rather academic, don't you think?

I've been enjoying working on the 3D projects and even have some ideas for possible venues for them. Terra Toys and maybe furniture stores have come to mind so far. Terra Toys has a little gallery but they also have a display case with three dimensional objects too. Once I have a bit more 'product' I may go around in this heat and see if I can do any good. I even revamped my LinkedIn summary yesterday as my 'situation' has changed recently. I'm still adjusting to it though more as a mind game than anything practical so far. I get so awfully tired of being practical, don't you?

I've done some impromptu drawings on the newspaper I've been covering my work table with. Impromptu drawings are my specialty, you know. I'll share one with you. Thanks.

I stumbled across a Pinterest page yesterday that had an accumulation of vintage photos of famous artists. Among them were, Leger, Klee, Munch, Magritte, Van Gogh, Dali, Man Ray and others. Some had been colorized, but tastefully. I downloaded a few to study more carefully. We tend to forget that artists are just people with a different skill-set. A few months back I found a page of photos of artists with their cats. Picasso had two pictures, one when he was young and one when he was older. I guess it is safe to say that Pablo was a 'cat person.' As I remember Dali was a cat person also; he just liked a larger variety than your average house cat. Such was Dali.

It made me realize that I don't have any photos of me actually painting or drawing. I guess I could do the popular 'selfie' but it would be nice if I had folks who found my true calling something worthy of chronicling. O well. Painting is usually a lonely or, at least, alone time profession. I found it interesting that in several cases it was ANOTHER artist who took the photo. I don't remember if it said or not, but in all the photos I saw of Klimt he was wearing this full length garment which I am sure was good to keep paint and turpentine off good clothing but none of the shots were taken in his studio. They were of him walking along out of doors or on a lake in a rowboat. Obviously, he wanted folks to know his profession by his garb.

From childhood all the way through my thirties, the only photos available were found in reference books in the local library or in books I myself purchased. Nowadays we have much greater access to data. I am constantly researching people and events. I find it delightful to be searching for one thing and find something totally different but equally interesting. These photos, for instance, opened tiny windows into a moment of an artist's life. Some were very informal and some were obviously taken by a professional photographer. There was one of Gauguin playing the piano without pants or shoes. Luckily he had long shirt tails. ;)

I'm still trying to figure out what I'm going to do when I 'retire.' Social Security will not suffice; my work retirement fund won't last long either. So I'm brain-storming my options. I would very much like to devote the rest of my life---my sight and mind, inclusive---to my artwork. I know the usual options for that, such as placing work in restaurants and galleries. There is such a dearth of galleries here that would appreciate my inclusion, though sometimes I wonder if I'm not just being the least bit defeatist. I have been known to talk myself out of things. We'll see. I did see a restaurant yesterday with some artwork for sale around the walls. That has opened my eyes just a little. There was even a few 'sold' tags too.

February went by in a blur as I prepared for and then experienced my first studio tour. It went okay but wasn't quite the event I wanted it to be. At least I got some exposure and the event to some degree paid for itself. It did go a long way to calcify my belief that curiosity, at least of the creative or intellectual varieties, may be diminishing along with critical thinking and empathy. 'ART' has become something that the average citizen has a limited understanding of, especially now that the conceptualists have sprung up like so many ugly weeds in the once well-defined garden of the art world. Many look to Marcel Duchamp as the 'father of conceptualism' but I think he just wanted to loosen things a bit---not throw centuries of artistic aesthetics out the readymade window. I also think he had a rather sardonic sense of humor. That fountain was full of that wicked sense of humor of his. 'R. Mutt' indeed.

I've been painting today on a piece I started yesterday. It is based on the sketch I used on one of the tote bags a week or so back. I think it is coming along okay and I should be done with it soon. I hate to overwork a piece. Finesse to a certain degree and then leave well enough alone. It's a 12 by 16 inch piece on 1 and 1/2 inch deep stretcher bars.

I should have produced more this weekend but I've not been feeling very energetic. I have found myself taking several short naps daily which somehow haven't impacted my usual sleep pattern. Strange. Are they the result of physical or psychological factors? I am not exactly sure.

Anyway, more later. Hopefully, my energy and enthusiasm will return soon in equal parts.

Seems it's a new year again. Notice that fresh NEW year smell? Hmmm. You might have better smelling ability than I. :) Looks and tastes a lot like the one that just passed too. I have a theory that each successive generation is just a bit crazier than the last. I'm also of the opinion that we are losing our ability to empathize with others, hence our inability to see others as our equals and therefore find it easier to injure, manipulate and cheat them. There are studies to back me up, unfortunately. I think if you are a 'me-me-me' person, it comes back on you sooner or later. Maybe there is such a thing as karma after all. It must be miserable to be that way.

Ok, I'm not talking much about art now am I? Trouble with me is I observe, paint, work at my job but don't have much of a venue to either write or 'say' what's on my mind. During the Christmas break, I went days without conversing with another human being. Some might think that nice but I always thought I was an interesting fellow to have as a friend, acquaintance, companion, etc. I never thought in a thousand years I'd find myself in an almost social cone-of-silence. Yes, you are probably thinking that some of it is self-imposed and you'd probably be partially correct. I do have some friends I see almost weekly and they are nice enough to tolerate my less than rosy disposition on occasion. So I guess I may not be quite as isolated as I let on save that I haven't found another person with whom I can communicate with that is yin to my yang, so to speak. I thought I had once but it didn't really work out. Sigh. It doesn't have to be a 'romantic' partner, really, just a kindred spirit.

A week back, I had a person from Singapore say he wanted four or five of my paintings 'to start.' I found it odd he didn't pick out any specific pieces when he emailed me via Artwanted. He also said I should get a vendor's credit card set up and he mentioned Chase. He also said he'd had some bad dealings with PayPal and would rather use his credit card. Well, I queried Chase about it and a nice guy on the phone said that there are scams where people use stolen credit cards to buy things and when it's discovered to be stolen the bank---like Chase---will demand their money back from the seller. This way the dishonest person gets whatever you are selling them and not only do they get the product, in this case my paintings, but the seller has to pay for the mistake of trusting them. Okay, so maybe there is a reason or two why a person such as myself might 'sour' a little over time. If you are reading this and you are one of those, I say you should be trying to do good not evil in this world and if you are an artist like myself just trying to paint, exist and paint some more, watch out for these scammers. This brave new technological world has given villains a wider net with which to draw in the trusting and ill-informed.

I'm working on my second painting of the year right now. It's another sketch-based piece like so many of mine are. It's funny. I tried doing some sketches other night and they all turned to mush. I'm currently using drawings I did a month or so back. This one is a little different, I think.

I'm going to upload the 2017 AVAA 12BUY12 Christmas Show invitation. The director used my 'Bird In The Ornament' and it's the second year in a row that I got on the digital invitation that is sent to folks. It sold also. :)

I guess it's about time I wrote a little something in my blog area. Lord knows I usually have a lot to say about 'something' though I always finish thinking someone might need an attitude adjustment, someone very near and dear to my heart. Ah, it's still beating for the moment. I'm assuming anyway.

Yesterday I picked up 'The Horror of Now' from the Art Space Gallery and dropped of '20/20' for the upcoming Fall Show which has its reception next Friday, the 13th of October. Instead of taking 'The Horror of Now' home, I decided to hang it in the tech room where I work. I've already had a couple of comments regarding it, mostly favorable.

I don't like Friday receptions, especially Friday receptions that begin at 6 and end at 8. Too early nowadays when you factor in when folks usually get off work and the traffic congestion that inevitably occurs starting around 5 and ending around 7. I know I usually make a bee-line for home unless there's something important I need to do and what I define as 'important' now lives in a narrower margin that it used to. AND if you factor in families, not lone wolves like myself, the time factor from home to dinner to 'what to do tonight' the timeline becomes a real issue. I think ALL openings should be on Saturday, start around 7 and run to 10. AND if there's people still hanging about enjoying themselves then 10 is just a suggestion not a rule. BUT, as I say, I have little say in what the powers-that-be ultimately do.

I haven't painted all week and it's beginning to tell on me. If I don't paint or draw almost daily I get nervous and preoccupied. There's a nagging feeling that there's something missing or that I'm wasting precious time. I guess the older I get the more I think I should maintain a certain level of productivity in areas that are important to me. I mean, if they are not important to me, how important am I going to treat them anyway? Think about that sentence a bit and it starts to make sense.

I went around the house last evening taking pictures of art hanging on walls. For insurance purposes perhaps or just as a visual record of what's on the walls early October 2017. There's one pic I took in my bathroom that I thought I'd share. And as I can only upload one pic in the blog area, though I'd upload multiple if I could, this will have to suffice.

Well, today the 2017 Membership Show has its reception at Austin Art Space. It was September 2012 on the very day of that year's Membership reception that I rejoined Austin Visual Art Association. I had been a member in the late 70's and early 80's but had let myself slip out of sight for several decades. Funny how the years pile up behind us so quickly.

I have just finished, "The All-Day Retreat,' a painting I've been working on for awhile. I say 'finished' but I usually tweak my work after the fact if I live with it for awhile. AND, I'm sorry to say, I'm living with quite a few of my paintings at present. I guess I'm going to have to re-think where I'm putting my new pieces as available wall space has become a thing of the past since I started painting almost exclusively in late 2013. It IS a small house after all.

The thought that entered my head, the one that prompted my blog today, was the question of whether or not the so-called viewing public is interested in the least in what the artist thinks. I say 'the' artist but I probably mean 'any' artist as well. Have many actually read the letters that Vincent wrote to his brother and others during his lifetime. I'm pretty sure they have been published. I have read excerpts and some of them are heart-wrenching and/or very sweet. If his tragic life were not common knowledge, I wonder if his work would be so highly prized today? Just a thought that popped into my head as thoughts are want to do. :) He is the epitome of the tortured artist though, for the most part, he tortured himself. Most misery is contributed by external sources but it is, ultimately, how a person deals with these sources that determine whether they cause psychic damage or not. For some, the irritations of life, like the grain of sand that bothers an oyster, merely become the impetus to create artistic pearls as a self-protective response. I can safely say this has been the case with me over the course of my life. I have always sought solace in the arts, from writing, music or drawing/painting.

I put the liquid refreshment that I will take to the reception this evening in the frig this morning. I had several good conversations with artists and attendees at the last reception for the Summer Show. If nothing else, I hope to repeat that experience tonight.

Well, like everything 21st Century, even the term 'artistic temperament' is getting trivialized and, I'm thinking, misdiagnosed, if you get my meaning. I have always thought having an artistic mind or artistic temperament had very little to do with bedlam or being mentally aberrant and more to do with having a unique way of seeing ordinary things---seeing the 'art' in the ordinary. When I was young, I thought everyone saw the world the way I did. I couldn't fathom that all minds were different but experience taught me one thing pretty early on. I grew up in rural Texas, you understand. It is OK to be different so long as you don't get too carried away. Of course, I grew up in the 50's and 60's in a world that, at least on the surface, appears to be very different from this one. I think nowadays we are more likely to parade ourselves like peacocks in the hopes that folks will see our uniqueness---or maybe our 'assumed' uniqueness. As I'm not of the peacock variety, let me quickly point out, my life has been spent learning all I can about art and artists, living and dead, with little if any contact with the academic side. I wrote poems for thirty plus years, beginning in high school about the time as started having migraines, now I reflect. I did not write to impress others; I wrote to better know and understand myself. Writing poetry involves an intense form of thinking. If you don't believe me, try writing a good poem. Uh, I did say GOOD, okay. :)

I have drawings going back to the late Sixties. Self-taught would be the best description of my drawing style. I did watch the Jon Gnagy TV series when I was a kid and my parents bought his deluxe kit probably when I was around 12 or 13. I had that kit and was using it to teach seniors the basics when I was an activity director at a retirement residence in the late Seventies. Believe it or not, it was stolen from the basement art room.some time before I left that job to manage an art supply store in the early Eighties. I enjoyed my brief tenure at the store but it didn't last long as the owners didn't really have a clue about running a successful business. It isn't all "build it and they will come" hodge-podge thinking.

This little missive started out with my discussing the so-called 'artistic temperament' and I'm afraid it's become somewhat auto-biographical. So I guess I'm attempting to convey how my temperament might have developed into something approaching that. I read several pointless articles on-line today on the subject. One was about having such a temperament but not being an artist. I don't think you can have one and not do things artistically but a lot of these short articles won't let you comment. It also was too short and didn't come to an great conclusion. I think these folks are paid to write something of certain length, make it more or less intelligible and throw it onto the Internet as little gems of insight and/or wisdom. Please swallow at your own risk, I say.

I could probably ramble on for another paragraph or so but let me just say that I think all kids are born with some flavor of artistic temperament. I say this because of the pieces I see working in an elementary school. It is unfortunate that we shame each other out of keeping art an active part of our lives. I personally think we'd all be happier more balanced individuals. But I'm only speaking from personal experience. When I feel my external life in the general population spiraling out-of-control, I retreat to my peaceful inner world of art where I can express thoughts and ideas that are untouched by fear or prejudice. Keep compromise OUT of your work and for goodness sake, don't ask others their opinion unless they are art teachers and even then take their advice with a grain of salt. You do see the type/quality of work coming out of our universities these days?

If I could only take my internal world external and cross-pollenate with others around the world, we might have a planet moving in the right direction. Just a thought or two from yours-truly. :)

Everything is screwy so we might as well 'go with the flow.' This is a paraphrase of something someone said last night as I dined with some of my conservative Baptist friends. Well, they are closer to being 'friends' than the majority of those going by that classification on my Facebook page. It's funny how trivial we've made even something as truly valuable as friendship, but I digress.

When our current president was brought up in conversation, I made what was taken as a disparaging remark and one of the ladies there said, "Oh, you are one of those." I was reminded immediately of a recent trip to an AT&T store to get a new sim card for my 'old' Blackberry and the young thing there (more or less feminine) said the exact same words. So I began thinking, as I am want to do. I concluded that I am indeed one of those. One who doesn't feel the need to spend money foolishly merely because there's a new version of it that's 'so much better.' I'm one of those who doesn't belong to any political party but who researches the facts before voting for a candidate. I don't listen to biased rhetoric or blatant propaganda and greedily swallow it as truth. This includes the usual talking heads on the tube and those in authority in my personal life, especially those speaking from a pulpit. I'm one of those who stands outside of any gathering or group and observes with, usually, bemused detachment as human intercourse plays out. Lately though, a feeling of dire concern and worries of impending doom have entered my thoughts. This knee-jerk reactionism I see on the rise is a symptom of something more deeply rooted than mere prejudice and/or bigotry. I'm reminded of a story by Shirley Jackson titled, "The Lottery." It seems humanity in its collective state is an unreasoning beast who must, occasionally, devour its scapegoat for the sake of 'the greater good.' I think this is why we love so to play the blame game; everything is someone's fault and it's usually someone else's not our own.

I think this is why my art might be construed as 'outsider' because I do not swallow current trends and my pieces are not designed to please the public. I am not a religious person but if I were I'd definitely 'thank God' for that, whether that entity be alien, male, female, both or neither, corporal or ephemeral. It seems even our concept of omniscience is sorely lacking in imagination. Maybe it's time for 'The God-Bird?' ;)

My artist of the week is Max Beckmann, a German artist who died in 1950 and who was linked to the Expressionism movement, an association to which he appears to have been vehemently opposed. We have to pigeon-hole everything and everyone, don't we? He did lots of self-portraits. Below is his 'Self-Portrait with Horn.' It was painted in the late 30's, I believe.