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I'm finally beginning to feel like my old self. Well, my old self with enough energy to feel like doing much of anything that isn't deemed a necessity. I've been dragging around pretty slowly this last month or so. I've told folks that I hope they hold off the 'zombie apocalypse' until I can move faster. Of course, now I think about it, there was a point where they might have mistaken me for one of their own. ;)

I've had a canvas on the easel for a while now. It's coming along but slowly. I have to say that I've been tempted to do it as a paper piece since I can usually finish those at a faster rate. I did upload a small drawing recently, but it's not exactly making a big AW splash, it seems. I've actually drawn a good dozen or so things over the last week or two, some just black gel ink and some with color. My drawings are usually the bastard brother to the painting anyway---or they just stay the little bastards.

The piece on the easel is from a line drawing and for now I like the line drawing better than what's on the easel. But like I am want to say, " I'm still working on it."

I think I'll scan and upload the line drawing for this blog entry. It might give a little insight. Its title is 'Birdbrain Nirvana.'

Tonight's the reception for AVAA's 'For The LOVE of Art' show at Austin ArtSpace Gallery. It's been a little over a week since I had a medical procedure and I'm still recuperating. But that said, I do intend to make an appearance at the show this evening. I don't know if I can stay the full reception, but I'm feeling pretty good, so we'll see.

I haven't painted a stroke for around 10 days, which indicates a bit of a hiatus for yours-truly. I DO have a couple of sketches I want to play with and I also have a blank stretched canvas on the easel, so maybe this weekend I'll begin again.

I've also been toying with the idea of starting in acrylics and finishing in oil, but so far that has only been something swirling around in my head the last few days.

Addendum: I've just returned from the show. It was well attended, though I do see a lot of the same faces, with some variation, from show to show. I stayed until 7:12 pm. The reception is from 6 to 8, so I did OK. If anyone other than V had reached out and chatted, I might have stayed longer. As it was, I had little incentive.

A person's artwork tells a lot about the artist. Just viewing the pieces in the show, one can glean quite a bit of data. Maybe there's little need for additional communication? I did take another artist's lead and leave several of my business cards near my artwork: Woody's Blind Date. There's a pic of it in the 2014 sub-gallery, BTW.

First and foremost, I consider myself a sentient being, not necessarily a human being, primarily because of all the negative connotations that nomenclature implies. Too many seem to think falling back on "I'm only human" is a good enough excuse to do so much that is selfish, wasteful and even evil. It seems, as a race, we do not look inwardly so much as upon the surface of things around us and if that surface is polished enough, it merely reflects what we want to see, not things as they are.

I think I have said before that art, like life, should be a journey. This journey should be one of fearlessness and, in some ways, selflessness. The ability to take one's self out of contemporary context, to look upon what is going on around one with an observer's objectivity as though studying some alien race, that is the kind of egoless journey I'm speaking of. Unfortunately, it can be rather a lonely sojourn, this brief stay in the unadulterated 'here and now.'

I think we all inhabit, to some degree, a world of self-delusion. In this world, our mirrors lie to us each day like that fictional one of the wicked queen. We surround ourselves with whatever feeds and sustains the delusion; things that strengthen it, individuals who reinforce it. And as mass and immediate communication across continents has become an everyday reality, this delusion has become more and more homogenous. Our desires have become rather base, generic and more and more, they have become immediate.

In my own small way, I am battling this homogeneity, this strong pull toward sameness that has spread like a computer virus across much of human consciousness. Maybe we are settling for less because in some ways we are BECOMING less. This 21st Century distain for sentimentality is, I think, symptomatic. It's as though we are becoming afraid to feel on a personal level, to feel true sympathy and are losing our ability to empathize. If we lose this ability totally, our societal cohesiveness will be gone. We will become a crawling seething mass of selfish egocentricity, unwilling, perhaps even unable, to look upon our fellows with anything resembling kinship. Everything will be reduced to a 'what can I get' mentality. I think, dear readers, that you can agree that this is happening even now.

I see my work as outside of the 'art world' because I see that self-absorbed entity becoming increasingly trivial and inbred. I don't even see my work as 'outsider art' because that loosely-defined group is becoming more and more an artificial artifice, in much the same way 'country music' has become an artificiality in modern times. I do see my meager output as being true to me, the artist. It is not concerned with what is 'trending' at any given moment, nor is it geared to impress or disgust. I think MacLeish would have liked it because it simply IS. :)

My work may never prove to be enough to others. It is enough, I think, that it proves sufficient to me. Nothing is perfect and you will never hear me proclaim my pieces to anything other than imperfect shards produced by this imperfect self. But like you or you, it's the only one I have; I do not possess it, it possesses me.

The 12BUY12 show's reception on the 6th of December has come and gone. I would give you a moment-by-moment account, but if you've been to many art show openings, you know they are, by and large, very similar, if not repetitive.

Even at the shows, I am more an observer than participant, I'm afraid. I did see Debra Wilson, who is always very supportive of my work. She is a former semi-resident artist at the Art Space Gallery who purchased a set of my art-earrings last year. She mentioned them at this show.

Also another significant person attended the show and she is always a wonderful face to see. And I think she'd like to join the art association and show work too. I've told her for years she should pursue her artistic bent more but she usually only poo-poos me. Sometimes all that it takes is a little confidence to take that next step. I think with a little confidence she could move the world. :)

My old photographer buddy, Eduardo, arrived rather late to the event. Folks on average welcome him more warmly than me I observed. Interesting. I wonder why this is? Anyway, he told me he was going to Bolivia in the new year and stay several months. He does photographic studies of indigenous people and has published several books. He usually only takes a 'real' job long enough to make enough money to pay for his next journey. That must be an interesting life-style. He also mentioned retiring, which I thought was interesting given what I just wrote. He is approximately my age, BTW.

I didn't run a tally but I think this show wasn't as well attended as the Fall Show. There were a lot of events/competition that night, including other art events, musical concerts and Christmas-related festivities. Last year the show opened the same day my work group went on an out-of-town trip and I arrived just before it ended, so I can't say which year was better attended. I didn't see any piece of art receiving the coveted RED DOT OF SALE though, which is rather disheartening considering the show's name. :)

The 2nd show of the season, The Fall Show, occurred last Friday evening at Art Space Gallery. I arrived early with my usual assortment of beverages, all alcoholic, and added them to the ice-filled case in the front area. There were already people in attendance, looking about at the show's pieces.

I noticed there were several rather large pieces in the front area where usually all the work for a show hung. The area also lacked my painting, I noted. Going further in, I noticed other of the show's work in the room where the wine table resides, and, there, to the left of the door just inside I found, "The Conversation." I thought it looked pretty good where it was.

As I meandered back toward the front of the gallery, I heard a gentleman ask another artist who had contributed a cubist-like painting, if he too had painted, "The Conversation." I announced that, no, that piece was mine. That gentleman and I talked for some little length of time and I also showed him some of my pieces via my Android tablet. He suggested I market my work to a publisher for use on cards, etc. I told him I had made some homemade cards and had put some of my images on jewelry I had made in Mexico via a photographer friend last year.

By this time, the little gallery was beginning to really bustle with activity and it was progressively difficult to carry on a conversation. I was feeling like I needed something cold but not alcoholic and stepped out to a nearby yogurt shoppe. When I returned the space was really beginning to feel like a crowded phone booth.

A gentlemen who had recently left the gallery as one of its resident artists arrived and we began to chat. (There are, on average, 6 or 7 resident artists at any given time.) It seems he had just returned from a month in Paris France. We both looked carefully at a rather large oil pastel that had been encased in a clear plastic coating, making the occasional comment. We discovered that the lady who had been standing near us during our discourse was the creator of the piece and she told us the plastic began in liquid form and was poured upon the piece, allowed to drip over the sides, dry, and then the extra was cut away. I gave her one of my cards and she gave me one of hers and we talked for a bit. I'm not sure if she took offense that I thought her piece had a certain androgynous quality, but the other gentleman had agreed. The lady and I shortly thereafter ceased our conversation and I selected a bottle of one of the beers I had brought from the case.

I noticed two things about this time. There was no live music and the director of AVAA didn't speak to me when she arrived. I figured that her silence meant she had not brought the name tag she had mentioned in a recent e-mail. Of all the artists at the Membership Show last month, it appears I was the only one who couldn't find his tag in the box with the others.

Oh well, I thought, they WERE rather large and I could make my own easily enough, though it did raise a nagging question which I decided to let re-settle to the bottom of my consciousness where it could do no harm.

A lady then entered who wanted to know where my piece was hung, so I escorted her back to the wine room and, in doing so, began a conversation with another of the resident artists. I told her I was trying to loosen up a bit in my painting and she hurriedly insisted that I not change my style which she described as unique. I told her that at this late stage that would be quite the impossibility. It was just after this that another resident artist engaged the lady in conversation and I began to roam, meandering through the narrow straits the crowd left for navigation.

I was feeling a bit morose as I made a mental note that none of my regular attendees had showed. It was then around 7:30 and the reception had 30 minutes left to it. I sat down in a chair, sipped my Fat Tire and watched the affair for another 7 to 10 minutes and then I got up to leave. There was really no one to say good-bye to so I headed out into the parking lot. I noticed there was a gentle breeze and the nearby Walmart was abuzz with activity so I made a point of driving in the other direction to gain egress.

I am uploading a low-rez jpg of a photo of Marcel Duchamp I found recently on the Internet. I really like it.

I'm remembering my prior hesitancy regarding painting exclusively this year as I've filled all my walls and still have some on the floor. A restaurant owner who told me his current artist was leaving in May, has apparently gotten his dates confused. Anyway, for months it was good motivation and, not only that, reinforced the habit of having something on the easel at all times. So now the habit is ingrained.

I'm part of a show that opens tonight. It's the annual Membership Show of AVAA here in Austin. Here's hoping I can make some good contacts. Of course, I know a lot of my problem is my reluctance to 'promote' my art with due diligence. I have this site, an account on Redbubble and a video of work from 2012 on YouTube. I hand out business cards on occasion and I take my tablet with current images to the shows I'm in locally. This totals on average 5 or 6 a year since I started showing again in late 2012. I have yet to enter an out-of-city/state/country show because of the bother and expense of shipping, etc. Guess I'm lazy and/or too timid to go that route yet. But if not now, when?

Someone put up a nice nude this morning, and I have a piece I've been hesitating to upload because of some folks' problem with mammaries. IF it's still up in the morning, I'm tempted to upload 'Red-headed Woodpecker' and let the censorial chips fall where they may. :)

As promised, I'm uploading a pic of the little magnetic sketchpad I salvaged from my work environment. I have found it a good new tool with which to streamline and perfect imagery.

Measuring only three and a quarter by four and one eighth inches, with a diagonal measurement of five and one eighth inches, it forces me to focus on basic shape rather than detail. This has given rise to more streamlined imagery which has manifested itself in the last three paintings I have uploaded. I have a fourth on the easel even now. :)

This just goes to illustrate that an artist need not rely on the new hi-tech gadgets to develop ideas. One either has them and can pull them out with basic tools, or does not. I find many of the new technological playthings to be rather counter-intuitive and slow, at least for me. Now if your work is entirely digital, then your viewpoint and/or experience will probably differ widely from my own. But ideas all come from the same place, regardless the tools. ;)

I uploaded 'Self With Dark Cloud' today and mentioned I might write a little about it as well as upload the sketch that I used as a starting point for it. So as I have a few minutes to kill (very strange expression don't you think?) I thought I would follow through with that threat. :)

First, let me say that the photo of the painting was taken just as dawn was breaking today and so the sun ran across it low to the horizon and thus accentuated the texture of both the canvas and the acrylic. I paint pretty thin usually but did, on this occasion, make the hair a bit thicker. Probably just the result of wishful thinking. ;)

As you look at the original sketch, you will notice one of my truncated figures with shadow, as is my want, but I decided to bring the image in and focus primarily on the face and neck with this piece. Originally, the sketch did not have the mountainous horizon line or the cloud. I added these while describing to someone at a local restaurant what the painting, still on the easel, looked like.

The colors came about in process and the harlequin aspect of the them did not escape me. As I told an AW artist recently, the more I paint, the more I feel I NEED to paint. This actually has three meanings. The first, I find painting in and of itself very stimulating---some may say relaxing, but that's not exactly true in my case. I find it more like playing chess with the canvas as my adversary. :) The second, I feel when I am painting, that it (the intellectual/artistic process) fulfills a need. The third, the more I paint the more I, hopefully, improve. There is no such thing as the perfect painting, at least within the mind of the artist who paints it. One usually either tires of it ("the love affair is over") or gives an effort a pat on its proverbial head and pronounces it 'good enough.' :)

This is only the second time I've entered my blog area this year to write a few lines. Sorry about that. I've been either busy at work or artwork OR haven't felt I had anything anyone might find interesting enough to read. Of course, when my energy level ebbs, my writing flies right out the window---probably to roost in the same tree as that woodpecker I hear most mornings. I hope they have a nice visit. :)

Several times this year, I have found myself returning to previous paper works as inspirational material for my paintings. I recently spent a 4-day weekend working on a piece that I sketched spontaneously onto the canvas. That effort did NOT rise to greet my expectations. I have put it aside for the moment. Such a lackluster experience depresses me greatly. I don't feel I have time to burn like I did in my youth.

I will admit that the acrylic paintings have usually deviated from their paper counterparts. I think 'Supplicating Bird' is probably the closest I've come to duplicating both the composition and color of the paper piece. But the year is still relatively young, so we'll see what happens down this year's artistic road. ;)

I have mentioned that I made a New Year's resolution to paint in 2014 rather that create works on paper, but I may have to re-think that resolution soon. I might start doing a small color piece on paper and, if I like it sufficiently, try painting it. Otherwise, I may find myself re-hashing older pieces infinitum.

I'll also try to write more frequently and with greater eloquence, if I can muster the energy. :)